CENTERING OUR THOUGHTS

AUGUST 27

When World War II broke out, our A.A. dependence on a Higher Power had its first major test. A.A.’s entered the services and were scattered all over the world. Would they be able to take the discipline, stand up under fire, and endure . . . ?                                     AS BILL SEES IT, p. 200

I will center my thoughts on a Higher Power. I will surrender all to this power within me. I will become a soldier for this power, feeling the might of the spiritual army as it exists in my life today. I will allow a wave of spiritual union to connect me through my gratitude, obedience and discipline to this Higher Power. Let me allow this power to lead me through the orders of the day. May the steps I take today strengthen my words and deeds, may I know that the message I carry is mine to share, given freely by this power greater than myself.

Alcoholics Anonymous World Service Inc.. Daily Reflections: A Book of Reflections by A.A. Members for A.A. Members (Kindle Locations 1750-1751). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

The history of AA is so important to me. It means that for years, years before me the fellowship of AA survived everything. It goes back as far as World War II some 75 plus years ago. Men went off to war around the world and were able to carry out their duties. While under fire, the presses that they encountered they would not drink. I have to admit, although my sobriety seemed like a humongous task, I have so much admiration and respect for these heroes  in all sense of the word. Heroes as military men and heroes as nondrinking individuals.

Because of these Heroes, I can today us them as my “Spiritual Army”.  I am focused. I pray to feel the spirituality fill me up and help me remain obedient, fill me with gratitude and discipline me to help me fulfill the orders of my day. This all enables me to carry on and give back freely what I was given.

24 Hours A Day

A.A. Thought for the Day

“We must be willing to make amends to all the people we have harmed. We must do the best we can to repair the damage done in the past. When we make amends, when we say: I’m sorry, the person is sure at least to be impressed by our sincere desire to set right the wrong. Sometimes a person we are making amends to admits his own fault, so feuds of long-standing melt away. Our most ruthless creditors will sometimes surprise us. In general, we must be willing to do the right thing, no matter what the consequences may be for us.” Have I made a sincere effort to make amends to the people I have harmed?

Meditation for the Day

The grace of God cures disharmony and disorder in human relationships. Directly you put your affairs, with their confusion and their difficulties, into God’s hands, He begins to effect a cure of all the disharmony and disorder. You can believe that He will cause you no more pain in the doing of it than a physician, who plans and knows that he can effect a cure, would cause his patient. You can have faith that God will do all that is necessary as painlessly as possible. But you must be willing to submit to His treatment, even if you cannot now see the meaning or purpose of it.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may willingly submit to whatever spiritual discipline is necessary. I pray that I may accept whatever it takes to live a better life.

Anonymous. Twenty-Four Hours A Day (p. 98). Martino Fine Books. Kindle Edition.

My Thought…I have made amends, I have done what I could to repair the damage I caused in my life. Some was well accepted, some not. I lost some people along the way…Most the time the people I made amends to had no idea I had harmed them in any way. They were usually the ones I harmed through omission. Meaning I neglected to do it or left something undone. I continue to make amends as needed today. I can not and will not let ‘things or people’ rent space in my head any longer. I drives me crazy…..

My Meditation…Everything I do today goes into God’s hands. In the beginning I had NO idea what God’s treatment was for me other than what I was told His treatment was for me. Now KNOW…I have gone to meetings, pray and pray and that is my medicine.  Like a diabetic must have his or her medicine, I must have mine on a daily basis.

My Prayer…another simple prayer…I just say it as written above….I pray that I may willingly submit to whatever spiritual discipline is necessary. I pray that I may accept whatever it takes to live a better life.

 

OOPS!

Oops…In my last post, Giving It Away I messed up. Well here is the true alcoholic in me. I have to write here and let you all know I goofed. Had to let it go. I seemed to get the days mixed up in my 24 Hour a Day sharing section. Seems I did some for August 25 and some for August 26. No matter…

Bottom line is I did my reflections and Meditations. Does it really matter whether the days are kept in any particular order? Probably not. I guess if you look at it, what if the pages didn’t have any dates on them? Or what if it just happened to be what I needed that day on the page(s) I read? Guess the bottom line is WHO CARES?

I guess I am getting a littler “weller” because when I started writing this post, I did. Now after getting it out of my head – I Don’t!  Oh, what a feeling that is. To not have “things” in my head. Little “things” or big “things” doesn’t matter. I can not let “things” sit in my head. I don’t live in my head any more…Have to empty the thoughts and move on.

Yup, I think I am getting “weller” every day I continue to move forward by doing all the things I have been taught in AA right from the start….

Have a wonderful rest of your weekend…. and REMEMBER LIFE is GOOD!!

GIVING IT AWAY

AUGUST 26

Though they knew they must help other alcoholics if they would remain sober, that motive became secondary. It was transcended by the happiness they found in giving themselves for others.                                                                                                        ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 159

Those words, for me, refer to a transference of power, through which God, as I understand Him, enters my life. Through prayer and meditation, I open channels, then I establish and improve my conscious contact with God. Through action I then receive the power I need to maintain my sobriety each day. By maintaining my spiritual condition, by giving away what has been so freely given to me, I am granted a daily reprieve.

Alcoholics Anonymous World Service Inc.. Daily Reflections: A Book of Reflections by A.A. Members for A.A. Members (Kindle Location 1744). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

I give to others daily by being useful. I knew from the beginning after learning in AA that in order not to drink I had to give back what I had…that became so much more as time has gone on. I have learned that by giving away what I had, I could be so much more than sober, I could actually be HAPPY. That was what I was looking for all along.

And, I have been given the daily reprieves which was also a daily reprieve from drinking but has also turned into so much more. A reprieve from living in my head and my past. I maintain the daily reprieve by remaining to stay willing, teachable and improving my contact with God through prayer and meditation.

24 Hours A Day  

****  I commented on these passages yesterday, I read the wrong pages. But no matter, I must have needed to see and hear what was on these pages yesterday and today. Oops*** The meditation and prayer read the same as yesterdays however I must have been thinking differently today because the – My Thought is a different thought. Hmmm….God works the way He works. He Gave me What I Needed, Not What I Wanted

A.A. Thought for the Day

“If we are still clinging to something that we will not let go, we must sincerely ask God to help us to be willing to let even that go too. We cannot divide our lives into compartments and keep some for ourselves. We must give all the compartments to God. We must say: My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.” Am I still clinging to something that I will not let go?

Meditation for the Day

The laws of nature cannot be changed and must be obeyed if you are to stay healthy. No exceptions will be made in your case. Submit to the laws of nature or they will finally break you. And in the realm of the spirit, in all human relationships, submit to the moral laws and to the will of God. If you continue to break the laws of honesty, purity, unselfishness and love, you will be broken to some extent yourself. The moral and spiritual laws of God, like the laws of nature, are unbreakable without some disaster. If you are dishonest, impure, selfish and unloving, you will not be living according to the laws of the spirit and you will suffer the consequences.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may submit to the laws of nature and to the laws of God. I pray that I may live in harmony with all the laws of life.

Anonymous. Twenty-Four Hours A Day (p. 98). Martino Fine Books. Kindle Edition.

My Thought…FAITH without works is dead. [BB Into Action, p.88] I use my 7th step prayer to remind me I need Him and the prayer also reminds me what my primary purpose is…to be useful!!

7th Step Prayer…My Creator, I am now willing that You should have all of me, good and bad.
I pray that You now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do Your bidding.
Amen  “Faith without works is dead.” Copyright © Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. BB Into Action, p.88

My Meditation…I must remain teachable and honest, pure and loving. If I decide not to abide and live in a way that is appropriate to particular circumstances I will suffer the consequences…

I try to keep my meditations simple…in fact I did quite a bit of meditating today. Went for a hike and shared my intimate thoughts and feelings on a spiritual level with God. Felt really good. Very freeing and made me feel healthier and happier.
My Prayer…This particular prayer above confuses me. So I just say my third step prayer for this day of prayer. Which once again reads, “God, I offer myself to Thee – To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!”

 

THE GIFT OF BONDING

AUGUST 25

Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.                         ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 63

Many times in my alcoholic state, I drank to establish a bond between myself and others, but I succeeded only in establishing the bondage of alcoholic loneliness. Through the A.A. way of life, I have received the gift of bonding—with those who were there before me, with those who are there now, and with those yet to come. For this gracious gift from God, I am forever grateful.

Alcoholics Anonymous World Service Inc.. Daily Reflections: A Book of Reflections by A.A. Members for A.A. Members (Kindle Locations 1734-1738). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

I was given the gift of bonding. Relationships are what is between me and others. I learned how to bond with other human beings in AA. I was told to use this third step prayer…”God, I offer myself to Thee – To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness
to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!” Copyright © Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

I use this prayer often. I don’t say it every day but there are times when I may be having difficulties with other people I turn to the Big Book and for some reason I will wind up reading exactly what I need to read/ hear. I am able to establish relationships based on  shared feelings, interest or experiences  today because I am free of being in my own prison.

24 Hours A Day

A.A. Thought for the Day

“If we are still clinging to something that we will not let go, we must sincerely ask God to help us to be willing to let even that go too. We cannot divide our lives into compartments and keep some for ourselves. We must give all the compartments to God. We must say: My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.” Am I still clinging to something that I will not let go?

Meditation for the Day

The laws of nature cannot be changed and must be obeyed if you are to stay healthy. No exceptions will be made in your case. Submit to the laws of nature or they will finally break you. And in the realm of the spirit, in all human relationships, submit to the moral laws and to the will of God. If you continue to break the laws of honesty, purity, unselfishness and love, you will be broken to some extent yourself. The moral and spiritual laws of God, like the laws of nature, are unbreakable without some disaster. If you are dishonest, impure, selfish and unloving, you will not be living according to the laws of the spirit and you will suffer the consequences.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may submit to the laws of nature and to the laws of God. I pray that I may live in harmony with all the laws of life.

Anonymous. Twenty-Four Hours A Day (p. 98). Martino Fine Books. Kindle Edition.

My Thought… I “Let Go and Let God.” I pray to let go of my own will. I try not to have my ego run my life. All of the apartments in my head belong to God now. God already knew the good, bad and ugly of me. Now I know too and I know he knows…so I ask to all my defects of character removed so that I can remain useful to all others. However, every once in a while I hang onto something I just don’t want to let go of.  When it gets bad enough, I pray and ask to have whatever it is removed…and for some reason the burden lessens and more times than not, the burden is removed.

My Meditation… I must remain teachable and honest, pure and loving. If I decide not to abide and live in a way that is appropriate to  particular circumstances I will suffer the consequences…

I try to keep my meditations simple…in fact I did quite a bit of meditating today. Went for a hike and shared my intimate thoughts and feelings  on a spiritual level with God. Felt really good. Very freeing and made me feel healthier and happier.

My Prayer…This particular prayer above confuses me. So I just say my third step prayer for this day of prayer. Which once again reads, “God, I offer myself to Thee – To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!” 

 

Not Too Old, Not Too Late

YourNotTooOldPic

I am finding I am never too old, and it is never too late.  Love it!!  There are thing I still want to do. I have exhausted one bucket list and I am in the process of making a new one.

My first one was things like going to the Army vs Navy Football Game with my oldest son. Did it, it was awesome!!  Not everything on my list was huge or unattainable. Mostly little things.  Finishing up some cross stitch projects I never had time to do, travel in this beautiful state of Florida….beaches, beaches, beaches and oh yeah, Disney World. Lots to do here in Florida. Go back and visit my Texas Family and friends, go to All Army Softball Tournaments, get to see my Army pals, and the list went on and on…but I did a lot of what I never thought I would never do again.

The best part of all this is that I have no regrets. I have learned that, “You are not too old, and it is never too late.”  When I was away recently, a friend and I keep saying we need to stop and smell the roses. So true. I have been taught, once again in AA – that we ONLY HAVE TODAY!!  No words ring truer as I get older. I have physically slowed down , but I have the mid of a 20 year old…curious and eager to learn. I have a mind that goes, and goes, and goes…sometimes I have to sit and slow it down. Learned how to do that too, through my daily meditations.

So when someone says to you – “You are too old, and it is too late.”  Tell them “Never Too Late for Grace; Never Too Old to Change”

Have a wonderful evening!!

TOWARD EMOTIONAL FREEDOM

Hello, I have been gone for a little over a week now. I was enjoying the life that was given back to me through hard work. Not drinking, going to meeting after meeting, joining a group, getting a sponsor, going through the Steps of recovery one at a time in order with a sponsor. All these things have given me not only back my life, but a life beyond my wildest dreams. Never would I have imagined going to be with friends from forty years ago without having fear of “oh my gosh, what are they going to think about me…” and all those other emotional feelings that go along with fear of the unknown.

I have been able to continue to move forward and do all these things and more because I continue to grow and practice what I learned from day one. I practice the principles every day of my life today and hope to remain open, honest and willing…

AUGUST 20

Since defective relations with other human beings have nearly always been the immediate cause of our woes, including our alcoholism, no field of investigation could yield more satisfying and valuable rewards than this one.                                            TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 80

Willingness is a peculiar thing for me in that, over a period of time, it seems to come, first with awareness, but then with a feeling of discomfort, making me want to take some action. As I reflected on taking the Eighth Step, my willingness to make amends to others came as a desire for forgiveness, of others and myself. I felt forgiveness toward others after I became aware of my part in the difficulties of relationships. I wanted to feel the peace and serenity described in the Promises. From working the first seven Steps, I became aware of whom I had harmed and that I had been my own worst enemy. In order to restore my relationships with my fellow human beings, I knew I would have to change. I wanted to learn to live in harmony with myself and others so that I could also live in emotional freedom. The beginning of the end to my isolation—from my fellows and from God—came when I wrote my Eighth Step list.

Alcoholics Anonymous World Service Inc.. Daily Reflections: A Book of Reflections by A.A. Members for A.A. Members (Kindle Locations 1700-1704). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

As mentioned above I was and sometimes often still work with “defective equipment. My thinking is not ‘right’. I turn mole holes into mountains. I hold onto resentments (not as long or as often any more). But having learned to become willing to pray, helping to turn over my will to God, I have been given the freedom to grow and move on. If I pray and let the bad ‘stuff’ out, there is room for the good now and my mind remains uncluttered with resentments and defective thinking. I wrote my Eighth Step list and kept hearing about the “Promises” that I was going to experience. I was beginning to have hope and feel the Promises of peace and serenity. “Are these extravagant promises, we think not….”PROMISES OF STEP NINE

I had to CHANGE, and I did and continue to adapt. I had to learn how to live a whole new life. In fact some of the people, places and things that I had been associated with I am no longer associated with. But the emotional freedom, that was and has been the most important part for me. It means I am free from feeling like a victim of and controlled by my emotions.  I learned how manage my feelings and  not react to them so they don’t control me. I learned how to take responsibility for not only my actions but how to take emotional responsibility, i.e., responsibility for my feelings. How? By once again, doing all that I learned from the people before me.

As you can tell by my writing, I am not a writer, nor do I remember proper grammar, or any of those things that make a good writer. I am a person, plain human being, that puts down on paper exactly how I feel. I tend to babble, and ramble…that’s who I am. I am an open book just like my life is an open book. Being self-centered I worry about what people think….Go figure…..

24 Hours A Day

A.A. Thought for the Day

“When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith. When we see others solve their problems by simple reliance upon some Spirit of the universe, we have to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work, but the God-idea does. Deep down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of God. Faith in a Power greater than ourselves and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself.” Am I willing to rely on the Spirit of the universe?

Meditation for the Day

You should not dwell too much on the mistakes, faults and failures of the past. Be done with shame and remorse and contempt for yourself. With God’s help, develop a new self-respect. Unless you respect yourself, others will not respect you. You ran a race, you stumbled and fell, you have risen again and now you press on toward the goal of a better life. Do not stay to examine the spot where you fell, only feel sorry for the delay, the shortsightedness that prevented you from seeing the real goal sooner.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not look back. I pray that I may keep picking myself up and making a fresh start each day.

Anonymous. Twenty-Four Hours A Day (p. 95). Martino Fine Books. Kindle Edition.

MyThought…I stopped doubting God when I saw what was happening to people before me. They were happy, in spite sometimes of all the ‘stuff’ happening around them. They were smiling, and laughing. Helping each other, talking, sharing all the things that I was learning to do. They were all my Powers of Example. If it (FAITH) worked for them, then may be, just may be, it might work for me too. What did I have to lose! I became willing to rely on God, the Spirit of the universe or my Higher Power. It worked then, as time has gone by and today. Why wouldn’t I continue to rely on something, someone other than me….

My Meditation…What is done is done…can’t go back, so I do not dwell on my past. I have learned from it but I don’t live in it any more. So, be positive and keeping growing and moving forward.

My Prayer…simple prayer, simple direction! Start each day as a new day, learn from your past and move on…..

 

I Will be back!

Hello 

I have been away at the Pensacola Naval Air Station in Pensacola, Florida.  I was privileged to gather with my All Army Softball teammates from years past to cheer on the current 2018 All Army Women’s Softball team. We took the Silver medal. Air Force took the Gold.  We had a ball….reminiscing, cheering on the teams and hanging out together. It seemed like we never left each other. The gals date back to 1976 when the All Army Women’s Softball Program began, we had women from 1976 to 1981 show up. Well represented. Lots of FUN!! Would not have happened if I did not get and remain well.

Anyway, I will be back on track tomorrow or Tuesday to pick up on the Reflections and 24 Hours A Day Thoughts, Meditations and Prayers. Just need to catch up on my everyday ‘things’.

Have a wonderful night and we will be together again and catch up…

Oh what a day

Fantastic!! Here at the All Service Women’s Softball Tournament in Pensacola, Florida. Don’t think it’s be here if I had not gotten well.

I am here with five other Army women who played on the team. There are two who played in 1976 when this whole thing started. So gals here, the alumni, go from as far back as 1976 o 1981. I played in 1980 and 1981. Was an awesome experience. So very proud to have once again been a part of paving the way for women athletes, especially women in the military.

What was fun today was that I met a gal from the Air Force team from 1981 when we went to Barstow, California. What a neat thing to happen.

Anyway, just another example of what not drinking and getting well can do for you….where my experiences have taken me lately are beyond my wildest dreams…

So please, continue on your roads to your happy destiny…I will catch up on sharing my experience, strength and hope with you and share my experience with my daily reflections and my 24 Hours A Day as soon as I can.

Right now I am living and enjoying my life. Thanks for stopping by…